The Hidden Cost of Living Abroad in Bosnia after 70
Guilt, Family & the Reality of Expat Life
In this video I wanted to talk about something that rarely gets mentioned when people dream about living abroad later in life.
The emotional side of it. The part that doesn’t appear in travel brochures or Social Media feeds.
I’ve been living in northern Bosnia and Herzegovina for over 26 years now. I love my life here. I truly do. But being over 70 and living away from the country of your birth brings moments of guilt, worry, and emotional tug-of-war that you can’t always prepare for.
Aging parents back home, siblings needing support, children scattered across the world.
And you sitting in another country wondering if you’re doing the right thing.
There are also the practical frustrations. Paperwork that assumes you still live “back home,” renewing licences, banking, travel costs, and the simple reality that visiting family can be expensive and exhausting. None of it is dramatic, but all of it is real.
This video isn’t about regret. It’s about balance. About recognising that you only get one life, and contentment doesn’t mean perfection.
Living abroad later in life can be wonderful, but it isn’t 100% sunshine, and that’s okay.
If you’ve ever lived away from family, or are thinking about it, I’d genuinely love to hear your thoughts in the comments. These conversations matter more than numbers or algorithms.
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Dear David,
In our brief time on this earth, guilt is not something we should dwell on as we enter our golden years. As a Maltese national living in Banja Luka—just half an hour from Laktasi where you are based—I’ve spent the past five years permanently residing in BiH, and over the last 22 years I’ve travelled between Malta and here more than 70 times. For me, I ease any sense of guilt by “burning my boats” and embracing the life I’ve chosen.
Of course, costs are always a consideration, but technology helps bridge the distance. While it can never replace meeting loved ones face to face, it does allow us to stay connected in meaningful ways. And as someone else already said, the invitation to visit us is always open. Just as we once worked and travelled to far-off lands, our loved ones are welcome to spend time here in this beautiful country—a place that millions of people have never had the chance to truly discover.
Warm regards, vidimo se uskoro. George
It has been said that guilt is a huge consumer of human time and energy and I tend to agree. Society has so many relationship constructs--what we should and should not do, expectations at every corner. In the end, as you stated in your video, one has to be content. We only have one life after all. There has to be cooperation and understanding on both sides of the isle. You have established a life in Bosnia, you have a lovely wife and many friends. I understand that family is scattered in various locations and it is exceptionally expensive to travel, but thankfully we have many ways to stay in touch with technology. I trust that your family will be able to reciprocate your visits and visit you in your home in Bosnia. All the best as you navigate the waters of being in two places at one time.